Posts Tagged With: love


Do you realize how busy people is? How hectic the world and the whole universe is? Best things are now invented to make everything is easier, more practical and even more, in my personal opinion, ignorant.

Have you ever wonder where they headed? I mean those busy people. The hectic world. The hectic universe. Where are we going?

And even after everything, they are still not happy. And they keep busy, and, are they happy?

Was is ever worthed? All those efforts?

Is there still any room for love, tears and compassion? Or are they in a hurry also? In a hectic-hectic mode on also? Do we still have time for a 3 seconds hugs with people we care about?

Have we been overlooked all those quiet and silences?

Oh, how I wonder.

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Sending you the Stars

Dear my Unborn Child,

Spread your arms wide open up there.

‘Cos I’m sending you the stars.

Be good, baby ^_^


I miss you..

Categories: a letter to my unborn child, thoughts | Tags: , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Cika and Mika found Chocolates

Dear my unborn child,

There was a twin baby turtles, living in this messy world. They both curious about stuff and love to hang out to new places, meet new people, yes people. In short, for most turtles, they both seemed to be a different ones.

Today, they’re looking for a place to play around. Mom gave them some penny to buy candy, but they thought it would be nice to save it for know. They said saving is good for the future. Oh, well.

Cika, the pink-yellow ones, claimed that she is the eldest than Mika, the blue-green ones. only because she walks faster and think faster. Well, at least for a couple minutes, it doesn’t matter. She is the the oldest and have a right to tell Mika what to do. That’s the most important.

Cika and Mika, the twin baby turtles..

Now, as you see, they found nothing on their way to find a place to play around.

This is boring, Cika said.

Maybe we should try another way on the road home? Mika suggest gently.

So they went through a new path to home, and look around. Just a couple steps away, Cika runs into a place, and she screamed when she saw this…

Little Love, with Smuckers Blueberry jams inside, or Smuckers Orange jam, or Nutella.

Whoaaaa, they look very pretty and pink and, and.. like me! Cika’s happily excited to see this chocolates. Mika read the note next to the pretty things: Little Love, with Smuckers Blueberry jams inside, or Smuckers Orange jam, or Nutella.

And then there were some more, such as these…

Little Love, with Smuckers Blueberry jams inside, or Smuckers Orange jam, or Nutella.

This should be enough to feed the whole village for a month, Mika said.

And then we heard Cika’s screams again, Mika running fast to get near her.

Love Plain. Original taste.

These are so cute, I can bring them all for my girls at school! Yeah, these ones clearly less heavier than Little Love, Mika babbling.

They got curious and curious about these chocolates. It’s energy and we kids need that a lot! Cika shouting from a far, exploring another kinds of chocolate landscape.

Love Genji. Little genji with a cover of chocolate with original taste.

I want to taste it, can I? Cika asked to Mika. Yeah, why not? Mika answered. But makes sure we don’t get arrested later on, I don’t want to play catch with people, it’s definitely not an option.

Kiss Plain. Attached to a stick with original taste.

Kids, mouse and angels. Why not turtles? We kissed once in a while too, right?.. Cika look for Mika.

Mika is staring at another chocolates.

Love Rose. Inside: blueberry and or orange from Smuckers, and or Nutella. Little flowers: plain, original taste.

It’s like, swimming in a chocolate, Mikaaaa….

Pink strawberry flavor marshmallow with a cover of chocolate with original taste. Flowers, original taste.

Careful, Cika. You don’t want to step too close with it.

But, Mika… I want them so bad….

Yupi fruity gummy candy with a cover of chocolate with original taste.

Trees? Mika wonders.

It’s a gummy candy inside, silly. Ck, boys will be boys… Cika said.

Love Stick. Inside: blueberry and or orange from Smuckers, and or Nutella.

It says here, these ones are the bestsellers, Cika. What do you think? Cika? Cikaaa?..

Little Love. Inside: blueberry and or orange from Smuckers, and or Nutella.

Mika found Cika back to the point they started. Why you’re going back here?  Mika asked Cika.

Mika, will it be a trouble for you if you chip in too so I can buy and take some of these cuties back home?

…and Cika pose those eyecandy’s face to Mika.

Mika got silent for a moment, he imagine to carry them home just the two of them.

Little Love packages of 2 and 3 chocolates

Oh, they’re so kind to give us the packaging also, so it will be carry on easier on our way back home. Don’t worry Mika, you made my day!

Cika, our way back home is still far away, so I think we will eat them one by one anyway on our way home.

Okay, I will try to keep as many as them still for our  friends back home. I promise I will try my best. I’m just so excited! Cika is jumping up and down, feeling very happy that she can finally take some chocolates home.

Cika! Hold your self together, or no one will ever believe in turtles anymore. Come on, walk with me, behave your self. Act like you’re older and wiser than me. Like you used to to tell me before.

But I am, older and wiser! Mika!

Yeah, you are Cika. I believe you…

Hey, what is that? You don’t believe me? Let’s race to home, and I will prove you that you’re the youngest between us.

They walked their way far, from the place they never been before. It seemed like they just having fun with each other. Sometimes through everything, it will not matter what you’re doing, as long as you’re doing it with all of your heart, you will have fun and win it anyway.

So my baby, as they walk home now, I think it’s best for you to get some rest. Let’s pray for Cika and Mika, hope they will always find that new places, people and explore anything the world offers them. As I hope you will too.

Good night, Sweety.

Love you.

Categories: a letter to my unborn child, food | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

today I know

rantyyustinadewi (7/7/2011 9:39:51 PM):


I have a strong heart, today I realized that.

I may have a high temperamental mood, but I don’t easily judge people.

Even if I do, I’m not sticking with it forever, because for me, change is good.

I don’t know if I’m better than people I thought are bad ones, but I know my own value.

—that’s why my steps is rather ridiculous sometimes…

walking away, when I just feel comfortable

or travel long journey to find a new strange place

only to know if I still have that strong heart


Today I know, I still have it, thank God.

Even though to realize it, I got wounds. But I know pain will go away.

because I have you.

the one who never give up on me, no matter if my heart is strong or not.


I love you, mas-ku.

Categories: mess, thoughts | Tags: , , | 1 Comment

nothing left, nothing to complain

It was 2010. And I was planning for my next two years living. Continue my study to get master degree, continue on living my own simple life, working with people whose works I admire since so long, be a proud member of big-big family, continue on improving my self on the way. Maybe travelling, Asia, then Europe. Hmm…

In short, I was planning to live my life fully.

Thinking positive, I started to reach out for my friends, those who were needed help. One of them was my close friend, and in a desperate need of financial help. So I helped him. I loaned him my 10 years savings and even ask my other friend to also help him. He will return them back next month, I said to my self. So no worries. He’s my friend anyway.

One month passed and I haven’t seen my money back in my saving. He said, I need more time. Okay, I can wait for another month. No problem.

Three months later, I couldn’t find him anywhere. Not in the workplace he used to go, not in the house he once invited me to have dinner with, not even his pregnant wife. I couldn’t find him, even after make calls to everyone we both know. One day, I received one SMS. It says, “I’m sorry, Ranty. May God Bless You all the way. You are my angel for this. I’ll be forever in debt to you”. I called back, no answer.

I fell down the floor knowing there’s ‘angel’ word in the SMS. Only he who always call me ‘angel’. Only him. He’s gone. He took my savings, the loan from my other friend. He took away my 2 years plan, my 10 years cash-earned. My master degree, my living  the simple life, my everything.

He took my everything with him. This is hell.

Not one day passes without tears since then. I fall deep into blaming my own stupidity, my own naiveness, my own decisions. My head was like dead while my heart is crash down. Imagine those 10 years, ups and downs. Those crazy jobs. 10 years.

I’m screaming inside, and surrender to life. I got nothing left.

Today was my pay day. I earned almost nothing, but this is gonna be the last money I will send to my other friend who helped me to helped him, my runaway friend. He never knew a thing about my runaway friend. And it’s been so long since we talked in August 2010.

He called me just now and we have a little chat. I can’t help to cry and he asked me why. I told him that I finished the loan, that’s a big relieved. He laughs and told me that if someday I need help again, he will be happy to help.  Hearing this I know that he deserved the truth, so I told him everything. My savings, my friend, my ability to trust, my ability to see people again, my will to lead a full life through chances, all gone with the apologize my friend sent me by SMS. He was mad, and wish to know about this earlier from me. He said, I don’t deserve this. Well, nobody does.

I softly told him, I’m now only have couple bucks to live. Actually it’s like starting over again. All over again. I got nothing left.

As I wiped my tears, I told him, “but you see, now I’m learning about animation. My job is 12 hours/day, I don’t have time to cry or feeling sad. I make new friends, loses another, like usually. I’m loved by someone I respect a lot and he took good care of me while I got nothing to lean on. I have team at workplace that trusts my guts and believe my judgements for their sake. I’m now trying to complete my short movie. I got my books and precious songs, moments with close friends, sounds of my love on the phone everyday. Hell, I got my wine and the glass never empty”.


I got nothing left.

I got nothing to complain.

*God help me. Let me sleep tight tonight. Let me be home.

Categories: mess, thoughts | Tags: , , , , , , , , | 1 Comment

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